Your First Love…

“We love the things that destroy us, because in that destruction we truly feel alive.” ― Robert Pobi

You met her in your first year of college. You were just 17. You were introduced to her in a party by your friends. They liked her a lot too but weren’t as focused on her as you were.

Perhaps it was the way she looked or perhaps it was the way she made you feel, whatever it was you could never let her go. She became your obsession, your reason to live.

She was the forbidden fruit that you weren’t allowed to be seen with.

Every night you spent with her, you did things that you never imagined you would even in your wildest of dreams. She brought out the worst & the best side of you. Around her you spoke of your deepest fears, desires & dreams.

With her you felt you could conquer the world. You had your best moments of your life with her, even though you could never remember living through them.

With her though, you began to ignore the rest of the world, family, friends & your career. She was all you wanted in this whole world. Your whole life revolved around spending time with her. You had several interventions by many loved ones, therapy sessions & even put in a place but none could get you over your addiction over spending time with her.

You could never let her out of your system because you never met anyone like her before until that fateful day. With her on the passenger’s seat, you went for a drive & drove at a speed of 120km/h because she dared you to, crossed a red light & drove into a tree almost killing yourself.

That second changed your life forever.

You suddenly saw her for what she really was. You saw that bottle of Jack Daniels next to you & realized that only poison ran through her veins & that had tainted your mind & character in a way that there was no going back to that 17 year old you once were.

She led you to a state where you were left with no one by your side, you were all alone.

That’s when you left us all when you decided to take that final step over that bridge 100 feet over the ground below.

You forgot that there were still two, old people in this world who loved you even when you forgot them under the influence of alcohol that consumed your life. They are now sitting by your grave at this very moment, crying & wishing that you had never met her in the first place…


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